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wednesday’s who ~ someone who won’t say goodbye.

So it’s not really goodbye after all. Because you won’t let me go…

You haunt me like a ghost from my past as if I’ve done something awful to you. You invade my dreams every night. You plague my head in ways I can’t comprehend. Your memories won’t leave my head alone. Your image won’t go away and clean the slate. Those scenes won’t fade much as I wanted them to. I don’t have any intension of nurturing them at all, of clinging to the past that will never come around. I don’t know where they’re leading me. I don’t know why all this crap. I’m defenseless being clueless of what’s really happening. You know how I wanted to end all of this. You know how I fought with this stubborn mind trying to shut those memories off. You know how I argued with myself in an attempt to change her way of thinking. You know how I struggled to erase those images and put them behind me. But I guess I was defeated. I guess I wasn’t that strong enough to refuse. Because here I am again, unable to rein these hands, to stop this pen from writing these lines that describe how I feel today. Here I am again, trying to push these thoughts away, but without any success. They remain unmoved, unperturbed. Here I am again, striving to extinguish this small flicker of hope. Before it burns me again.

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